Let’s Remember Dorinda’s Birthday

As many of you know, a good friend passed away last Autumn. Today’s her birthday, so this is a little memorium to her. I still miss her dreadfully. (If you are curious about her outfit, below, she is wearing a recreation of early Viking garb. She was also a member of the Society for Creative Anachronism, or SCA. She was one of the finest artists I’ve known.)

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Let’s Remember Dorinda’s Birthday

Though why we remember
her birth,
when she has passed,
is a teensy bit silly.
I hear her laughing at it
even now because it always
seemed to surprise her to know
how much her friends cared.

It is sad to have her gone
but I still think that she
is past all that nonsense
of sadness and crying. She
did enough of it while she was here.

She’s cried enough.

So I remember her with a smile
and think of jokes I’d like
to tell her.

Friend of a Friend

The prompt today was to write about or as the friend of a friend. I couldn’t help but think about Dorinda Conlon, my friend who passed away unexpectedly this autumn. Of course I thought of her, as I have adopted or friended on facebook, as many of her “people” as would accept me. And so I’ve written about why.

***

My Friend, Who Died

Her friends are mine now,
or so I’ve claimed them,
because any link
however slight,
makes me feel her again
in my life.

Her sisters are mine now,
whether they know it or not
because I miss her
and wish her sisters
the best too.

Her sons are mine now,
though they don’t even know
that I care, not really.
But I watch them
for her
and imagine what she would say,
probably something irreverent
and shocking,
and hilarious,
but real and caring too.

She won’t be here anymore,
my friend,
and I wonder if she
could have known
how much she meant
to me.
I hope she knows
now.

***

And the second one is about gossip. ^_^

***

And the Biddies Had a Field Day

Betty was my great-grandma
and she love to tell
about the church she used to go to.
The biddies there (she called them that!)
would peck and scratch
at other ladies,
gossiping, and,
heavens knew,
just making stuff up
out of whole cloth.

One day a new woman,
Doris,
arrived at church
and the biddies were having
a field day.

Betty stood listening
for quite a while
to their poison.
And then she grabbed two of the
veriest biddies by the elbows
and, marching them over
to Doris, unabashedly said,
“Well, let’s find out,
then, if what you say
is true.”

And of course, Doris was
horrified
and gratified
and amused.

She and Betty became
the closest of friends.
But of course,
they never went back.

And the biddies had
a field day.

Eulogy for a Princess

I just came from the service of my friend, Dorinda Conlon.  I arrived just in time to sit down and sing a hymn and to hear Dorinda’s mom tell about her life. There was so much I already knew, but it was wonderful to hear her talk about her daughter. Dorinda was the oldest child, like I am, one of the things we had in common. She had one younger brother and three younger sisters and I have two younger brothers and two younger sisters. She had four sons, I had three. She was three years younger than me.

All of the details just confirmed to me that we had much in common and that was one reason we were friends. Another reason was that I frankly loved her, as I found many people did. It was just one of those things, I think she was someone people just couldn’t help liking. And I tried not to like her when I first met her–she was so beautiful and so perfect-seeming and such a good seamstress and so many things about her seemed impossibly wonderful. But there was no resisting her. She was a funny, beautiful, friendly woman, I too, couldn’t resist her charm and her easygoing nature, her kind spirit and her twisted sense of humor.  Yes, she had a warped sense of what was funny, and I loved that about her too. Sometimes she would say the most outrageous things, just to see who would notice. For instance, on her facebook page where it asks for school, it says she studied at Mount Olympus. ^_^

Her wrath, however, was to be feared. If someone hurt her family or her loved friends, she was ready for vengeance. The wicked humor would cut in such a subtle way, the ‘victim’ wouldn’t even know they were wounded until she’d gone. She was always there with a ready defense for her sisters or her sons or anyone who crossed them.

She was a wonderful friend to those who needed her, she excelled at being needed. She could lift the darkest mood and bring a smile to the saddest face with a humorous aside or quip. She shared her talent freely, helping and teaching others to be just as awesome as she was.

I will always miss her, and regret we didn’t have more time.  I kind of know she’s okay, but this is more selfish; I want her back, to talk to, laugh with, and just to have in my life again, but that isn’t going to happen. We will have to learn to live without her, but if we live life in a way that we can almost hear her musical laugh, that will just have to do.

Dreaming of Dorinda

I had a lot of trouble sleeping, I kept thinking about my friend (Dorinda Conlon, who passed away Thursday), and trying to forget for a moment that she was gone. And not having a lot of success. The sleep was spotty and the dreams were mostly irrational.

In the early morning hours, however, I did slip into sleep and I dreamed I was running down endless stairs, going toward a parking garage where I knew my friend was waiting. It was a long journey, it seemed hopeless at times, but I wouldn’t give up because in the dream, though I didn’t remember what had happened, I did know I just had to speak to her before it was too late.

Finally, after what seemed like hours of running and searching dim stairwells with poor flourescent lighting, I finally came out onto a landing that led to a parking area. I saw it was empty except for this super-shiny Lime Green jeep wrangler. There was khaki canvas strapped to the top and back and luggage all stowed. It was so her, the bright, sparkly lime green paint and all her baggage. ^_^

In the driver’s seat was Bradley, he gave a smile (you know his sweet smile!) and a half wave and started it up. Dorinda was in the passenger seat and poked her head out the window. And she looked just like she did when I first met her and her kids were still small. Her beautiful hair was in braids framing her face. She was grinning and yelled out in the most cheerful voice imaginable: “Are you ready to go!!”

And I looked at her and Bradley and smiled sadly and shook my head, and I said, “No, I’m not ready yet.” She just grinned at me and waved and yelled out, “Welp. I’m going now. See ya later!” She was waving and smiling so happily.

She was so happy, it made my heart melt.

And I woke up strangely comforted. Still missing her, but still, comforted that she’s okay.